Leela Eapen

A retired registered nurse

When I was in high school, I dreamed of becoming a Nurse, and surely the Lord granted the desire of my heart.

After graduating as a registered nurse from the J. J. Group of Hospitals, Bombay, India, and working a few years as a staff nurse in another local hospital, I moved to New York City in 1972. In the following year, I received N.Y. State’s R.N. license and I worked as an intensive care unit nurse for twelve years in one of New York City’s Municipal hospitals. During that time, I received a Bachelor of Science degree in health administration and community health from St. Joseph’s College in Brooklyn, NY. After that, I persevered in taking up new and challenging positions (from management to administration) in various nursing departments; God’s favor was upon me.  By His grace, I have always served the patients/clients and their families with compassion and integrity.

In all my life, God was with me as my stronghold. I’ve led a religious life, attended church services regularly, taught children’s Sunday school, and volunteered in many other activities. By the mid-1990s, I started having a great hunger and thirst for studying the Word of God, but I found it very difficult to understand. Due to my strong desire for the truth of God’s Word and to defend my faith, in 1999 I enrolled in the New York school of the Bible, in mid-town Manhattan, and graduated with an advanced certificate in 2007. During those school years, God began to do wonders in my life. He heard my prayers and cries and spoke to me through a prophetess in 2003. Since then, my relationship with God has continued to grow deeper and more personal, and He has become closer to me.

I’ve been married for forty-five years; we have two children, both reside with their spouses, and I live with my husband in Georgia.

Turn your darkness into light.

Jesus said, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life” John 8:12. (NIV)

Several years ago before my retirement, I prayed that once I stopped working, the Lord would help me to completely surrender myself to Him, that He would use me as His servant for the rest of my life; because over the years I learned the true meaning of the Scripture found in Matthew 9:37–38, Jesus said to His disciples, “The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field.” So I prayed, “Here am I, Lord, please use me as your servant.”

God has heard my prayers, and at first, He spoke to me through a prophetess, and as I spent time diligently studying His words and praying, He spoke to me directly. In a vision, the Lord gave me the title of a book and its content. I had no idea how to write a book, so I constantly prayed and cried out to God the Father, “Father, You know I am not capable of writing this book. I can’t publish your book without a writer who knows the Bible very well and has complete faith in you.”

Within a year, 2010, the Lord brought a complete stranger into my life, a faithful woman who had written two books (Poems), knew these uplifting scriptures very well and had experience in prison ministry for over twenty years. Her name is Carolyn W. May. God is so amazing! Not only was I able to complete the book (to be published), but also I was able to serve the Lord in the women’s prison. God blessed me to lead some of those precious ladies to dedicate, rededicate their lives to our Savior Jesus Christ, and give others the assurance of their salvation. God also blessed Carolyn and me to teach the Bible at the men’s prison on a weekly basis. I thank God Almighty for giving me such a privilege to serve Him.

In February of 2018, God put the thought in my heart to start the ministry on a website. At that time, I had no idea how to start, where to begin or whom to contact; in fact, I knew I was not worthy of starting a website, so I didn’t take it seriously.

In mid-July, God spoke and said, “Start the ministry on a website” at this point, I felt the urgency, so I contacted my son and asked him to help me set up a website as it was imperative that I obey God. On the following weekend, July 21st, he and his wife came home, and he spent long hours searching until he purchased and registered the domain, “Touch my heart ministries.org.” On the same day, his wife promised me that she would have her brother do the web design for the ministry. What an amazing God! The Lord supplied all of the needs…. It was the most joyous day of my life.

Today, Christians, young or old, male or female, rich or poor, famous or unknown, forget the fact that Jesus brought peace into this world. We are sometimes lead by our own hearts, ways, and emotions, which at times lead us into depression or even worse, for we take our lives in our own hands. It reminded me of my situation in 2002 when I consulted a neurologist about a stiff neck and tightness on my shoulders. The doctor was very friendly; we had a long conversation about my family. I began to sob uncontrollably, for I couldn’t bear the pain that caused the destruction in my household. The doctor told me I was depressed, prescribed the medication, and advised me to take one pill every day for one month. After filling the prescription, I drove to work and went directly to my friend Belinda; a prison minister, good preacher, and prayer warrior. I told her that I needed prayer—that I was depressed. I felt as though my emotions were flat like my brain was completely void. I felt like I was on the verge of collapse.

Belinda prayed over me using the Bible verses and advised me to continue praying using certain Scriptures she gave me to take home. Looking back, I know that this was the day I totally surrendered my heart to the Lord and Savior, and He took me in His arms. I prayed the Bible verses Belinda had given me over myself, and my Lord and Savior delivered me out of the schemes and wiles of the devil without taking one single pill prescribed to me!

Jesus turned my darkness into light and made me a productive child of God. The Word of God is so powerful when you believe and pray faithfully using Scripture that fits your situation. You will see the miracles and wonders, for the Bible promises us, His word will not return to Him void but will accomplish the purpose for which it was sent (Isaiah 55:11).

Dear friend, if you or someone you know is suffering from depression, share my story with them. Pray for them as I pray for you. Pray that they may not turn to alcohol or drugs, for this, will only temporarily masks the pain and eventually leads to destruction. Only God is able to heal the deep, crushing wounds in your heart. Seek Him, He is our Healer, Wonderful Counselor, and He loves you more than you can ever imagine or understand. The Lord loves you more than your parents, your siblings, your spouse, your children, and more than your friends love you, including myself as your friend. I have experienced and tasted it in my own life! He is always available every moment of our lives. Turn your heart toward Him and talk to Him…. He is waiting for you.

The Lord put in my heart to reach out and pray for those who are depressed, lonely, or despaired and uplift them with His words as I was uplifted in 2002. Whenever I hear about suicidal death due to depression, my heart grieves. This began when I heard about the suicide of Robin Williams (the actor and comedian) in 2014, for I liked him very much ever since I saw the movie Popeye. In 2018, Chef Anthony Bourdain’s death brought me tears, for I loved his show, “Parts Unknown.”

There are others who have taken their lives, including veterans and police officers. It truly hurts my heart whenever I hear of such deaths. This is why I named the ministry, “Touch my heart.”

On August 2nd, 2019, as I was editing this article, broke my heart when I heard the news of a twenty-two years old young lady was found dead who was suffering from depression; the granddaughter of Robert F. Kennedy.

In order to be better equipped, in this new endeavor, I took the Life Coach and Empowerment course and received the certificate from Life Empowerment and Entrepreneur Inc. in 2019.

Do not let the devil overtake your God-given breath of life. Do not be ashamed or afraid; be strong and courageous in fighting depression through God, and trust in the Lord Jesus Christ, for there is HOPE in Him. The Bible says: “The Lord is good, a refuge in times of trouble. He cares for those who trust in him” (emphasis added) Nahum 1:7. (NIV)

I pray and cry out to You Lord Jesus, “You touch many people’s minds and hearts through this ministry and save their lives.” Thank You, my Lord, and Savior.

I surrender this service to Lord Jesus Christ in glorifying His name, for it is He Who commanded me to start this Christian ministry on a website.